Having a good support system is crucial in getting through a journey like this. Any major life journey actually. I have always been open about our journey to become parents. Some may say they prefer to keep things private, and thats ok, but I knew I would want my village to be aware of what was going on. I felt it would honestly make things easier as I don’t get the ‘So when are you guys having kids’ question during family gatherings. Being able to pick up the phone and just have someone to talk to or say ‘can you come over’ makes all the difference in the world. They understand why you may not be up for going out, or why you chose to not go to that family gathering, or why you aren’t drinking.
Below are some photos and descriptions of some of the most amazing people! I am so lucky to have this village for support.
Our large family at our small COVID Wedding. My husbands family on the left, my family on the right! We are extremely lucky to have such a large immediate family. Michaels sister (in the orange on the left) acted as his Best Woman and my brother (in the blue on the right) acted as my Man of Honor for the day since our actual best man and made of honor were unable to be included.
Our mothers and my fathers girl friend have been rockstar supporters during our relationship, our wedding planning, and our TTC journey. They are strong independent women who encourage me to follow in their footsteps. They are a great example of exactly the type of woman, mom, and professional that I want to be. I have learned so much from all of them. Growing up, my mother showed me what it was to be strong and independent, while also maintaining a household, giving us all the things and experiences we could have ever wanted, and also being her true self. She was fun, creative, loving, and ALWAYS up front and center in everything that we did. Michaels mother, a true Portuguese type of mother, always worked multiple jobs to support her 5 children and husband. Her home was the center of the universe for everything their family did. She insured her daughter and 4 boys would get a great education, be well fed, and had everything they could have ever needed. My father’s girlfriend has been an amazing mentor to me. When I needed career advice or wanted to brainstorm career paths, she was a great soundboard for me. She’s a great example of a powerful voice in the room as she works to drive her initiatives for better lives, better support, and better outcomes for things she believes in.
Our fathers unfortunately passes away in 2024. Michaels father passes away in March after a 16month battle with a glioblastoma. My father passes away in May after many complications with infections due to diabetes. 2024 was a rough year for us. Learning how to navigate life without our fathers was more difficult than we could ever have imagined. Both of them gave amazing speeches during our wedding. They knew how to entertain for sure. Never shied away from a moment to speak in a crowd. They were both big men with big voices and even bigger hearts. Their passion, their sense of humor, their love for their family and friends….. it was contagious. We miss them so much every day. Navigating day to day life without their advice, support, and love is not easy for either of us.
Our Dads! <3
My best friend….. what can I say about this amazing woman. We met in 2001 during freshman year English class. We became instant friends over our similar impatience for people. Our bond just grew from there. She always jokes and tells people that she’s the only reason I passed that class…. apparently I used to copy her homework. I don’t think thats entirely true but it’s possible I guess. Over the years we continued to bond over similar interests and spent a lot of time together. Her family became my family and mine became hers. We babysat together, traveled together, got into trouble together, celebrated together.
About 10 years ago, after her and her husband got married, they also discovered that they would have issues starting a family. Luckily, they now have 2 amazing children (boy/girl twins). They are about to be 7 later this year and I can’t believe it. They know me as auntie and I am beyond honored to carry that title. Since she had experienced her own struggles, she was an amazing partner to have by my side through this journey. Even from 3,000 miles away. Her and her husband live in California while my husband and I live in Rhode Island. We may be 3,000 miles away but we talk almost every day and we travel back and forth as much as we possible can.
Not everyone is as lucky as I am to have had a best friend for most of my life. Me and this girl have been best friends since we were 7 years old. Our friendship has been through it all. Growing up, life changes, family changes, moving away, good boyfriends, bad boyfriends, marriage, kids, all of it. I am so lucky to have this woman in my life. She is so strong, hard working nurse, fantastic mother to 3 amazing boys, and a great wife to her husband of 10 years. We have gone through times where we are attached at the hip and times where we don’t speak for a while. At the end of the day, we are there for each other no matter what. We can always count on each other to answer the phone or meet at the bar to just chat or vent. I am so grateful for her!
This amazing spit fire is my sister-in-law. She’s one of the best people I know. We joke and say that she is the reason that me and my husband are together. I say joke but honestly….. it’s true. She encouraged her brother to create a dating profile and coached him through the process. As an English teacher, Im sure she wrote out his entire profile. LOL! Anyway, besides that, she is strong, passionate, intelligent, and loving. She can bake better than better than most. She knows how to throw a party. She’s THE BEST gift giver…. hence why I always have her go with me shopping for birthday and Christmas gifts! We bond over our love of wine and cheese boards. She encourages me to think differently about the world and empowers me to think more deeply about things. She’s been the best sister-in-law I could ever ask for.
My Mother! The true Queen. The reason I am the woman I am today!
She has been through so many life challenges and somehow maintains a beautiful smile. I am so lucky that we get a long the way we do. We bond over our love of corny reality TV, chardonnay, puppies, traveling, and beaches. Her love for travel and her hard work allows her to travel to fabulous beach destinations every year. She also enjoys the small weekend getaways to New Hampshire or Maine from time to time. She certainly finds ways t enjoy the little things in life and doesn’t let anything get in her way. Luckily she lives the next street over so anytime I need her, she is there. She helps us take care of the house, the dogs, and ourselves. I would be lost (and probably homeless) without this woman.
The Village!
These people keep me going. They are the reason I smile every day. Strong women who encourage me to be the best I can be. Through the good times and the bad, they are always there and I love each and every one of them.